Posts Tagged ‘end of life’

The Silent Killer – Poem by Gwen Barnes

I dreamt about my mum today

a cruel disease took her away

it crept up upon her from behind

and slowly crushed synapses in her mind

I watched it happen

I couldn’t fight

I was powerless, as she was

in it’s might

I sometimes hear the latest news

the scientists have made

the next breakthrough

but this killer is still at large

it’s appetite is on turbocharge

its killing millions in it’s wake

it must be stopped

for humanity’s sake

So all I can do is hope and pray

that it doesn’t get me one day

there’s evidence to suggest it will

by then there may well be a pill

to cure this dreaded predator of the brain

to let old age have it’s longest reign

to enjoy this life, to be fit and well

until it’s time to bid my last farewell.

By Gwen Barnes

(in loving memory of my mum who passed away with Alzheimer’s in 2016)

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End Of Life Planning Explore New and Existing Options

End Of Life Planning

On Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio

031516 ASR Funerla Options Dan Hanson

Tuesday at 2pm EST, 1pm CST, 12pm MST, 11am PST and 4pm London Time

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Today we will talk with Dan Hanson who has dedicated his life to helping people understand their options when it comes to end of life issues. As someone who has been in the funeral industry and who has owned a funeral home, he knows the best practices.  Dan loves helping people find the right choices for themselves and their families. His goal is to give unbiased information about new and existing options that many don’t know about, allowing them to plan the best celebration of life to meet their needs.   In doing so he has found it helps families and friends deal with their loss

Contact Information Dan Hanson                                          

(612) 229-6695                                  

dan@livingtreeplan.com                  invertedhammer@gmail.com 


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A Shell of a Body or a Shell of a Soul?

People refer to a person in mid to late stage Alzheimer’s as someone who lives in “A Shell of a Body.”  What does that really mean?  Most people use this phrase when communication no longer exists like it used to.

What I find interesting is people at the end stage of life may no longer communicate like they used to, but somehow they are viewed differently.  We have educated people one by one that a person who is in a coma or is receiving hospice or palliative care can “take in” what is going on around them; even though they may not be able to respond like they used to.  There is a level of respect still intact, one that seems to be missing in many cases when it comes to memory loss.

We have taught people to engage in conversation and touch a person who is in their end stage of life.  We have learned to look for different signs and signals from those we love and work with.  Society at large has been trained to dig deeper and not be so superficial and judgmental during these times. In fact, the medical profession encourages caregivers to continue to connect with a person in their end stage of life. We have been taught to appreciate relationships on a soul level, one with never dies and is engaged with all that is around them.

I challenge you to teach the world the same lesson about connecting with someone who has memory loss.  It is no longer acceptable to refer to any individual as living in “A Shell of a Body that can be cast away and forgotten.”   We must teach people the soul lives on and is engaged.

As a World we must recognizing there is a huge difference between the statement, “A Shell of a Body and a Shell of a Soul.”

Below is a short video clip where I tell a couple of stories to show the difference.

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The New Hybrid CAR Egiver™  

by Lori La Bey of Alzheimer’s Speaks and Senior Lifestyle Trends   

Being a Caregiver can be stressful yet very rewarding.  The problem I see with society today is the guilt from the judgment.  As Caregiver’s guilt can come from the person we are caring for.  Other times it comes from our family, friends, and onlookers. Judgment  is powerful and can make us feel powerless.  It can stop a Caregiver in his tracks from doing things differently or hiring support help. 

Many times Caregiver’s feel they are being watched and judged.  They are fearful of making changes knowing others may call them on those changes.  They don’t have the strength or desire to get into a confrontation with others.  There are too many other things to concentrate on.  They don’t have the energy or the time to waste, so they keep doing things the same way even when they are not working so well.   

As professionals in the industry we need to educate people on what I call the “New Hybrid CAR Egiver™.”  “CAR” stands for “Conscience Awakening of Relationships.”  “Egivers “has its own acronym but bottom lines stands for “Emotional Givers.”  There is so much more to Caregiving then our “To Do Lists”.  To Do Lists allow Caregiver’s to feel they are in control and doing something positive to help.  Yet true Caregiving is about embracing a relationship and providing emotional balance to the one we are caring for and our self, while assuring necessary tasks are completed.   

For myself, I came to this realization after my Father’s death in 2001.  For example, there is a huge difference between orchestrating lunch vs. going out to lunch with my Father as a daughter.  The focus of the interaction totally shifts.  People should not lose the base of their relationship to become a Caregiver.  The relationship should be enhanced.  

Lori La Bey of Alzheimer's Speaks and Senior Lifestyle Trends


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