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A Shift in Perspective: Different, Not Less

Below is an article by Author, Trish Laub who will be guest on Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio October 29th at 2pm ET, 1pm CT, 12pm MT, 11am PT, 7pm London and 6am in Australia on the Oct 30th.

Mark you calendars to listen to the show.

A Shift in Perspective: Different, Not Less

By Trish Laub

I think for a moment my heart stopped. Had I really been told that my dad was being treated for Alzheimer’s? I hadn’t really had time to absorb the news when I heard Maria Shriver, who has worked to spread awareness of Alzheimer’s, speaking about her father who had been diagnosed with the disease. She shared some valuable advice that she had been given: to accept her father as who he was at the time, just as she would have had he not been living with Alzheimer’s. That one piece of advice, intended for someone else, saved me! That was the start of my shift in perspective  —  that even with Alzheimer’s, the possibilities were limitless for my dad to have a meaningful life.

I imagine that I knew that there was a stigma about Alzheimer’s looming somewhere. But I had never known anyone with the disease, and I had no investment in the stigma. What I would come to learn through my experience with my dad was that the Alzheimer’s stigma is unfounded, for a variety of reasons, and is not only based on fear but also generates it.

Here’s what the stigma, and its negative ramifications, mean to me:

S-T-I-G-M-A

Shortsighted limitations => causes missed opportunities for quality of life

Taboo => thwarts supportive communication

Ignorance => results in fear

Genetic cause => exaggerates heredity factor

Memory erased => minimizes reinforcement of old or creation of new memories

Applicable to all => eliminates individuality and uniqueness

I had heard one piece of the stigma, that Alzheimer’s is a death sentence. In one pivotal moment, I had the thought “but perhaps Dad will die from something other than Alzheimer’s.” He had heart disease, and people died from accidents all the time. I didn’t want either alternative for my dad, but it opened up a new way of thinking for me. Alzheimer’s would be a factor in his life, but it might not have the final say.

Another pivotal moment for me was hearing that a doctor told Maria Shriver, “Once you’ve seen one case of Alzheimer’s, you’ve seen … one case of Alzheimer’s.” I was now ready to fight against any preconceived notion about life with Alzheimer’s, to find the uniqueness, and I refused to buy into the stigma.

Here’s how I saw my mission:

R-E-F-U-S-E-D

Rise to the challenges and recruit a care team to help

Educate myself

Fight for what’s best for my loved one

Unknown may not mean unbearable

Solutions abound to solve problems that arise

Engage my loved one wherever they are in that moment

Different does not mean less

I committed to doing everything in my power to see that Alzheimer’s was going to have the smallest-possible negative impact on my dad’s life. I had the great clarity that my dad was still my dad, that he might be different, but not less. He was not a disease, and Alzheimer’s was not his identity. I would work to keep his life as close to the way he would have lived without the disease.

My shift in perspective would go on to dictate that Alzheimer’s was not going to define the man who loved me unconditionally, as Alzheimer’s did not have that power. It is a disease, not a man, and certainly not my dad. I knew that I was in uncharted territory, but I was going to find my way. What I found was that even when living with Alzheimer’s, there are limitless possibilities to live a meaningful life, and that was a reality for my dad.

Sadly, the stigma associated with Alzheimer’s continues to exist. My own mom didn’t want anyone to know that Dad was living with Alzheimer’s, because she feared that others would see him as less. That is heartbreaking. The stigma is unfounded, based on outdated information, before the importance of diet, supplementation, exercise and brain stimulation were understood.  It doesn’t help that few want to talk about it. The stigma continues to propagate fear of being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or of having a loved one diagnosed with it.

Understanding Alzheimer’s is important. Knowledge empowers you with a clear understanding of what you are facing and reduces fear so you can analyze your options with a clear head and make educated decisions. We need to come out of the shadows and talk about what Alzheimer’s is and what it is not.

I believe that my dad’s success in continuing to live a meaningful life with Alzheimer’s was largely due to my family’s rejection of the stigma and fear, and our willingness to shift our perspective from limitation and deficit to limitless possibilities. If it was possible for my dad to live a most meaningful life to the end with Alzheimer’s, then it is possible.

Trish Laub will be a guest on Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio Oct 29th.
Website: www.trishlaub.com Email: info@trishlaub.com

Trish Laub is an expert on living with dementia and navigating the maze of care options and decisions for dignified care through end of life. Trish will be a guest on Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio Oct 29th.

Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio – Shifting Dementia Care from Crisis around the world one episode at a time by raising all voices and delivering sounds news, not just sound bites.

UPCOMING PUBLIC EVENTS WITH LORI LA BEY:

Coming to Elmhurst, IL – Oct 16th & 17th

Coming to Minnetonka, MN – Oct. 19th

Coming to Reading & Lexington MA – Nov. 13th & 14th

Coming to Anniston, AL – Nov. 21st

Learn More or Schedule Your Next Event with Lori La Bey https://www.alzheimersspeaks.com/contact-us

See what LeadingAge has to say about Lori La Bey

 “Feedback from the conference planning committee and our leadership team was extremely positive. Many attendees commented that she was one of the best speakers they had heard.” 

Pat Sylvia, Director of Education & Member Development LeadingAge WA

For More Testimonial

Diana Pierce and Lori La Bey

What Questions Do You Have For Those Living With Dementia?

Let Us Know and We Will Do a Chat on The Topic!

Juggling Dementia Care &

Finding Balance

Downloadable Tips Below

Fight Alzheimer’s Together

Find A Memory Café In Your Area

Push Dementia Forward – Participate!

Read Full Post »

Balancing Caring For Another When Working

Click Below to go to Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio which goes live Today at 2pm ET, 1pm CT, 12pm MT, 11am PT, 7pm London, 6am Wed in Australia

Having a difficult time balancing caring for others while still working yourself? Lori La Bey talks with author Liz O’Donnell about her new book. “Working Daughter: A Guide to Caring for Your Aging Parents While Earning A Living.”  Come and join the conversation as Liz shares some of her own story about caring for both parents while working.  We will find out some of the lessons she learned which can help the rest of us avoid the pitfalls that can exhaust us. Liz will also tells us about the positive side of caring for another.

Contact Liz O’Donnell at her Website:  www.workingdaughter.com

Thank you for joining Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio where sound information regarding dementia and caregiving is delivered.  Our true talk radio style goes beyond sound bites to help you in your everyday life with dementia regarding lifestyle, research, care models, family dynamics and more.  There is something for everyone here.

Listen in now or later.

Below Video compliments of Dementia Chats

Those with dementia talk needs and strategies to incorporate when building dementia friendly communities and businesses.

What Questions You Have For Those Living With Dementia?

Juggling Dementia Care &

Finding Balance

Downloadable Tips Below

UPCOMING PUBLIC EVENTS WITH LORI LA BEY:

Coming to Woodbury, MN – Sept 25th and 26th

Coming to Toms River, NJ – Oct 8th and 9th

Coming to Elmhurst, IL – Oct 16th & 17th

Coming to Lexington & Reading, MA – Nov. 13th & 14th

Coming to East Alabama – Nov 20th- 23rd

More Information to Come

Diana Pierce and Lori La Bey

Schedule Your Next Event with Lori La Bey https://www.alzheimersspeaks.com/contact-us

See what LeadingAge has to say about Lori La Bey

 “Feedback from the conference planning committee and our leadership team was extremely positive. Many attendees commented that she was one of the best speakers they had heard.” 

Pat Sylvia, Director of Education & Member Development LeadingAge WA

For More Testimonial

Fight Alzheimer’s Together

Push Dementia Research Forward – Participate!

Find A Memory Café In Your Area

Read Full Post »

Leveraging Art to Document Your Caring Journey

Click Above To Listen Live Tuesday – Aug. 6th 2019 2pm EST, 1pm CST, 12pm MST, 11am PST & 7pm London and on the 31st at 6am Australia. All Shows are Archived for Ease of Access.

Lori La Bey, host of Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio take with Dr. Mali Mann who is an adult/child psychiatrist, psychoanalyst and author.  She is on the faculty at Stanford School of Medicine, in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Science. Her latest book, Whisper, Forget Me Not, is filled with poetry and paintings portraying the experiences she’s had watching her husband struggle with Alzheimer’s. It’s a beautiful story of how tapping into art helped her find balance, process her journey and leaves a legacy of their relationship while helping others going through the same thing.  

Contact Information for Dr. Mali Mann

Email – malimannmd@gmail.com

Take The Dementia Airport Travel Survey Below

What Questions Do You Have For Those Living With Dementia?

Let Us Know and We Will Do a Chat on The Topic!

Juggling Dementia Care &

Finding Balance

Downloadable Tips Below

UPCOMING PUBLIC EVENTS WITH LORI LA BEY:

Coming to Woodbury, MN – Sept 25th and 26th

Coming to Toms River, NJ – Oct 8th and 9th

Coming to Elmhurst, IL – Oct 16th & 17th

More Information to Come

Schedule Your Next Event with Lori La Bey https://www.alzheimersspeaks.com/contact-us

Diana Pierce and Lori La Bey

See what LeadingAge has to say about Lori La Bey

 “Feedback from the conference planning committee and our leadership team was extremely positive. Many attendees commented that she was one of the best speakers they had heard.” 

Pat Sylvia, Director of Education & Member Development LeadingAge WA

For More Testimonial

Fight Alzheimer’s Together

Push Dementia Forward – Participate!

Find A Memory Café In Your Area

Read Full Post »

Unseen Gifts in Dementia

This Episode of Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio is Available On & After: Thursday – July 25th, 2019 at 2pm EST, 1pm CST, 12pm MST, 11am PST, 7pm London time and July 26th at 6am in Australia

Click Below To Listen To The Show

Call into the live show a (323) 870-4602  and ask your questions or make a comment.

Lori La Bey talks with author Wendy Wells-Chanampa about her book The Unseen Gifts of Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia; The Greatest of These is Love Come and join us for an interesting look at how we care and how we can find joy and love in the process. Learn ways to reframe and reduce the stress you carry when caring for a person with a form of dementia.

Contact Wendy Wells-Chanampa at:

Email:  wjchanampa@gmail.com

Website  www.seniorconsultantssrc.com 

Click Below to Download Your FREE Copy of Your Memory Chip™

Click Above to download

What Questions You Have For Those Living With Dementia?

Juggling Dementia Care &

Finding Balance

Downloadable Tips Below

UPCOMING PUBLIC EVENTS WITH LORI LA BEY:

Coming to Woodbury, MN – Sept 25th and 26th

Coming to Toms River, NJ – Oct 8th and 9th

Coming to Elmhurst, IL – Oct 16th & 17th

More Information to Come

Diana Pierce and Lori La Bey

Schedule Your Next Event with Lori La Bey https://www.alzheimersspeaks.com/contact-us

See what LeadingAge has to say about Lori La Bey

 “Feedback from the conference planning committee and our leadership team was extremely positive. Many attendees commented that she was one of the best speakers they had heard.” 

Pat Sylvia, Director of Education & Member Development LeadingAge WA

For More Testimonial

Fight Alzheimer’s Together

Push Dementia Forward – Participate!

Find A Memory Café In Your Area

Read Full Post »

Caring & Coping as a Working Daughter

This Episode of Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio is Available On & After: Tuesday – July 23rd, 2019 at 2pm EST, 1pm CST, 12pm MST, 11am PST, 7pm London time and July 24th at 6am in Australia

Click Below To Listen To The Show

Lori La Bey, host of Alzheimer’s Speaks Radio talks with author Liz O’Donnell about her new book, “Working Daughter: A Guide to Caring for Your Aging Parents While Earning A Living.”  Come and join the conversation as Liz shares some of her own story about caring for both parents while working.  We will find out some of the lessons she learned which can help the rest of us avoid the pitfalls that can exhaust us. Liz will also tells us about the positive side of caring for another.

Call into the live show a (323) 870-4602  and ask your questions or make a comment.

Contact Liz O’Donnell at her Website:  www.workingdaughter.com

What Questions You Have For Those Living With Dementia?

Juggling Dementia Care &

Finding Balance

Downloadable Tips Below

UPCOMING PUBLIC EVENTS WITH LORI LA BEY:

Coming to Woodbury, MN – Sept 25th and 26th

Coming to Toms River, NJ – Oct 8th and 9th

Coming to Elmhurst, IL – Oct 16th & 17th

More Information to Come

Diana Pierce and Lori La Bey

Schedule Your Next Event with Lori La Bey https://www.alzheimersspeaks.com/contact-us

See what LeadingAge has to say about Lori La Bey

 “Feedback from the conference planning committee and our leadership team was extremely positive. Many attendees commented that she was one of the best speakers they had heard.” 

Pat Sylvia, Director of Education & Member Development LeadingAge WA

For More Testimonial

Fight Alzheimer’s Together

Push Dementia Forward – Participate!

Find A Memory Café In Your Area

Read Full Post »

Dimensions of Dementia – A Sons Journey with His Mother

Click Below to Watch the Interview

Lori La Bey talks with Author, Elvis Gardin, about the dynamics between a mother with Alzheimer’s disease and a son trying to protect and help her live the best life in her elderly years and at the end of life.  You will hear their story of love, courage and battles and triumphs.

Elvis has written a book about their journey and how it challenges even the best care partners intentions.  Their story will make you cry, cause you to laugh and provoke you to think more conscientiously how you care for another person. The book, “Dimensions of Dementia” is a candid and raw story which comes straight from the writers’ heart to yours.

Click Below to Listen to the Show

Order your book and get it personally signed on Elvis Gardin’s  website below:   www.DimensionsofDementia.com

Email:  dimensionsofdementia@yahoo.com

Diana Pierce and Lori La Bey

Schedule Your Next Event with Lori La Bey https://www.alzheimersspeaks.com/contact-us

See what LeadingAge has to say about Lori La Bey

 “Feedback from the conference planning committee and our leadership team was extremely positive. Many attendees commented that she was one of the best speakers they had heard.” 

Pat Sylvia, Director of Education & Member Development LeadingAge WA

For More Testimonial

Fight Alzheimer’s Together

Video Interviews with Those Living with Dementia

Push Dementia Forward – Participate!

Click Below Download Tips

Find A Memory Café In Your Area

Read Full Post »

A Stepdaughter’s Caring Journey

Click Above to listen to the show

Lori La Bey talks with Author, Sue Anne W. Kirkham about her journey assisting her father and stepmother as they struggled with declining health and the onset of dementia.  Her book “Loving Zelda: A Stepdaughter’s Caregiving Journal” is an exceptional read with great insights. Learn Sue Anne’s biggest takeaways, surprising moments and what she would do differently if she had an opportunity for a redo. 

Contact Information for Sue Anne W. Kirkham

Email:  sawktalk2@gmail.com

Websites: www.lovingzelda.com     www.yourrecipesforlife.com

Facebook Author Page:  https://www.facebook.com/Sue-Anne-Kirkham-2043792472585222/

Diana Pierce of “What’s Next with Diana Pierce” talks with Lori La Bey , CEO of Alzheimer’s Speaks helping us reframe our expectations to replace fear with HOPE!

Diana Pierce and Lori La Bey

Schedule Your Next Event with Lori La Bey https://www.alzheimersspeaks.com/contact-us

See what LeadingAge has to say about Lori La Bey

 “Feedback from the conference planning committee and our leadership team was extremely positive. Many attendees commented that she was one of the best speakers they had heard.” 

Pat Sylvia, Director of Education & Member Development LeadingAge WA


Digital Dementia Summit is online and FREE from May 20-26, 2019

Click Above to Register

Click Above to Register – FREE – Multiple Speakers Each Day!

Fight Alzheimer’s Together

Push Dementia Forward – Participate!

For More Testimonial

Video Interviews with Those Living with Dementia

Click Below Download Tips

Find A Memory Café In Your Area

Read Full Post »

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